Showing posts with label discrimination. Show all posts
Showing posts with label discrimination. Show all posts

Thursday, July 30

Check Your Privilege Day

In the aftermath of George Floyd's death, I was trying to make sense of it all. It was a rude and shocking reminder of how cruel, inhumane and senseless our world can be. And I need to understand how that came to be, how for all the goodness and cleverness of humanity, we have allowed such a thing to happen. So I read, absorb and reflect. There was no shortage of materials, just from my Facebook feed. And I try not to read only one side of the story (good training from my Masters of Science Communication and also because of this TED talk) which often means that eventually I can't really only argue for or against any issue. I don't see myself as standing with only the police or with the blacks.

Of all the articles I read in that time, this one stood out for me. First of all, I aspire to be as humble and open as Jason is and secondly as I read Lori's response, my ignorance and obliviousness to my own privilege became increasingly apparent. There is no way to deny that I have privilege for being a Chinese living in Singapore. It is also with great shame that I admit I had personally questioned someone's intellectual capabilities based on skin colour. I may not had said anything at that point in time but the doubt that had arisen if detected by the other party would certainly had been a source of unjustified pain.

It feels extremely unfair. The world is unfair and unlikely to change overnight. Perhaps because I have myself been in the position of being the minority in other scenarios, I could somewhat empathize with her but I can never imagine having to face and deal with that kind of discrimination on a daily basis. Thus, it was then that I decided I would stand up, speak out and challenge any unfair instances which I may witness in future. We can all do better.

Then Racial Harmony Day rolled by. Although I had never celebrated it as a student, I always looked forward to dressing up for that day as a teacher! Facebook reminded me of the different styles I tried over the years, not one was Chinese. 😆 I supposed it can be seen as tokenism as depending on the school's directive, efforts toward celebration of RHD can be quite superficial. Yet, not having that experience as a student had resulted in me having practically zero exposure to other races until my university days?!?

Besides liking many of my teacher friends' RHD related photos on Facebook, I also chanced upon Preetipls' video which spurred me to pen this post. Highly doubt MOE will even entertain her proposal but after completing her checklist (I ticked 11 boxes) I strongly encourage everyone to check yours! Privilege is really not only based on race and I honestly believe everyone benefits from a heightened sense of self-awareness. Another alternative is to attempt The Privilege Walk (Singapore edition) which actually first happened about 4 years ago. I would be 7 steps ahead.

While preparing for this post, I googled "check your privilege singapore" to search for Preetipls' video, fully expecting it to be the first result but of course I was wrong. This is a topic that has been discussed again and again, (link, link, link, link, link) and until we as individuals begin to acknowledge these advantages afforded to each of us, it will continue to come up again and again.

Finally, as Preetipls mentioned, being highly privileged is not a problem in itself. And I certainly hope that this call to check your privilege does not backfire as suggested by this article! It is what we do with this knowledge and awareness that matters. Allow me to appeal to your moral responsibility that comes with privilege, do what you can or perhaps stop doing what you have been doing. Hopefully together we can prevent the next senseless murder.



Friday, June 19

How are you? Are you really ok?

<<I was challenged by a friend to raise awareness for PTSD earlier this month. I didn't feel up to that particular challenge 🤣 but I do want to speak out for all who may be suffering from mental illnesses and/or anxiety disorders. So here is me rising to the challenge in a different format. >>




Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and depression are anxiety disorders listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), the principal authority for psychiatric diagnoses. They are recognised conditions by experts so first and foremost we need to understand that people with these conditions are REALLY unable to just "get over it".

There are many good online resources explaining the details such as this one by SingHealth. Or you may prefer to watch the TED Talk video on it. Interestingly, almost all the Google search results and resources from Singapore focus on identifying symptoms and recommending treatments while the top result from a non-SG website is Time To Change whose focus is to end mental health discrimination. 

Time To Change has great suggestions for people who want to help and even an entire section on Personal Stories for people with mental conditions to share their experiences. It is also where I learnt to ask twice when checking in on people you are concerned about, hence the title of this blog. In Singapore, we have the Beyond The Label initiative by NCSS which I was only reminded of from Berni's Facebook post. So yes, raising awareness for this greatly misunderstood condition is the why I am writing this blog post.

Here are some of my personal experiences with mental conditions.

I have always been a rather emotional person. When I was younger, breaking up was so devastating to me emotionally that I probably slipped into depression a couple of times. I remembered distinctly one particular episode when I was working as The Little Gym instructor. To be professional, my job requires me to be energetic and approachable in front of full classes of up to 24 adults and children for 45 minutes stretch. I would be able to execute that, holding back tears and emotions when they threatened, and then totally break down behind closed doors right after the end of a class. Oh yes I handled it, if you call that handling it. I lost my appetite, grew really thin, and somewhat functioned in a zombie-like state. My dad, at a loss of what else to do, for the first time in our lives, wrote me an encouragement card in Mandarin.

Once, when I was eating a meal by myself, a stranger asked to join my table which I agreed. We started chatting but it became increasingly uncomfortable. When I tried to leave, he refused to let me out of his sight, put his arm around me and touched my bare skin. I was horrified and felt totally helpless even though it was broad daylight in a shopping center. It was only when I walked towards a security guard and voiced my objection did he let me go. I was shaking and crying as I recounted the incident at the police station, my best friend by my side. It is only today as I read this HealthHub webpage on post-traumatic stress reactions am I able to put a name to all that I felt and experienced for that period of time. 

During my career as a secondary school teacher, I shed tears on many occasions. Sometimes they were due to difficult students in challenging classes. There were moments when I felt ineffective in helping those under my charge. And there were times it seemed nothing I did would or could ever make a positive difference for those who I care deeply about. I am aware that I am a sensitive person. Pastoral care sessions in school were often my undoing. But I generally attribute those salty water to my disposition and in fact believe they are beneficial. However, one of my supervisors became concerned and suggested psychotherapy. So I received treatment. Initially I was slightly affected by the stigma and did not tell anyone about these sessions. But hey, now you know, I needed help to manage my emotions and those sessions with a certified psychologist really helped me.

A close friend of mine had turned to me when she was suffering from an anxiety attack. For a while, I held space for her, listened and supported her. As much as I love her, when the frequency of these distress calls kept increasing, I became impatient with her and even wanted to distance myself from her. Not proud to admit that I had judged her negatively in her time of need. Yet, it is also important to recognise that caring for someone with mental conditions is not easy and I have to acknowledge these mixed feelings I had towards her. Still love her!

Wow... quite a catharsis for me in penning this post. Then again, writing often is. But I hope I have also achieved my aim to raise awareness for PTSD, and mental conditions in general. Let's do our part to end mental health discrimination. Be kind to one another and spread love. 🎔