Restarting the Engine

A casual chat with a friend recently led to the revival of my LinkedIn account. 

Not something I thought would happen after failing to transition into a new industry that I was aiming for with my Masters in Science Communication back in 2018, and certainly far from my considerations after moving halfway around the world to a vastly different setting from my birthplace last year.

When I was still in the education service, as fulfilling as it had been, I eventually came to an understanding of what I do not want and what I do want out of my career. Unfortunately, the list of do-nots was disproportionately longer than the dos in my role as a teacher. So I left. 

I was optimistic about my "new" prospects in what I considered to be a niche industry for which I had deep passion for. Until I simply was, not. Around the same time, the husband began his research into migrating to a more preferable, desirable country. The whole notion of landing a "sustainability focused, financially rewarding, energetically flowy" career was just, shelved.

Honestly thought I read enough self-help materials to realize the dangers of attaching my sense of identity to work. However, beyond that, I truly believe I have so much more to give and offer than just being a housewife. Thus I promptly got into action when the said friend mentioned the availability of remote roles on LinkedIn!

 

The engine has successfully restarted. 

Well, at least I am pleased and confident enough to share my latest sample work as a freelance writer on Stoicism. Coincidentally, a philosophy that resonated with me after learning about Marcus Aurelius. Even more serendipitous that I just finished his Meditations! Intrigued? Read my introduction to a book on this timeless philosophy.. (although it is targeted at youngsters, I truly think Stoicism is for everybody!)

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Introduction

External things are not the problem. It’s your assessment of them. Which you can erase right now. -Marcus Aurelius

I stumbled upon the above quote in the aftermath of uncertainties brought about by the Covid-19 pandemic. Life is an ever-changing landscape that shaped our roller-coaster journey through which we navigate essentially alone. The pandemic with its enforced isolation had brought out the uglier side of humanity. It was against such a depressive backdrop that this little bit of Stoic philosophy stood out for me like a beacon of clarity and wisdom.

Discovering Stoicism: A Turning Point

Imagine it is 2020. The coronavirus is spreading to all parts of the world. We are isolated. The news that we get each day consists of which new country has it landed in, the number of infected people, the shortage of supplies, the difficulties, the inconveniences. The death toll. My mind is clouded with anxiety, frustration, and helplessness. I go through the mechanics of the day like a zombie. But when I read this quote, it shone through the darkness like a torch of a thousand suns. Indeed we have the power to erase the actual problem.

A Personal Odyssey: Applying Stoic Principles

From the genius of Marcus Aurelius, I studied other key figures of Stoicism including Zeno of Citium, Seneca and Epicetus. Each ancient had me delved ever deeper into Stoic philosophy and I found myself embracing the concept of identifying what lies within my sphere of control and letting go of all that lies without. It has transformed not just my perspective but my very approach to living.   

The Essence of Stoicism

Stoicism may seem like an abstract philosophy but to put it plainly, it is a way of life. The core of which is the pursuit of eudaimonia - a state of “flourishing" that is the result of living in accordance with nature and virtue (Pigliucci, 2024). When one practices this diligently, it is equivalent to gaining a superpower that helps one to stay strong and calm when the going gets tough.

The Relevance of Stoicism To Young People

As a secondary school teacher for more than a decade, I have witnessed first-hand the many challenges and difficulties faced by young people. From academic struggles and social pressures to mental health issues and family problems, youngsters can use all the help they can get to navigate all kinds of situations and overcome obstacles. I wish I had discovered Stoicism earlier so that more of my students could have benefited from my knowledge of Stoicism. It is evident to me that its core principles offer a crucial guiding light in chaotic times, a roadmap for them to navigate life’s tumultuous seas of the growing up years.

Walking the Stoic Path: A Call to Action

Here let me formally invite you to discover for yourself the timeless wisdom of Stoicism. It is the wish of all teachers for our students, young people who will be the leaders of tomorrow, to achieve their fullest potential. The Stoic Path can guide and lead you on a journey of powerful transformation if you weave its principles into the fabric of your life. May this exploration be your source of inspiration and empowerment, guiding you through the vicissitudes of puberty and beyond with courage and grace.

Goodbye Oscar..

We buried Oscar this morning.

He had been missing for days. Which was not unusual. He had been gone for a day or two before. The food we had put out was still disappearing, even though some days it was totally untouched. 

It was almost like when we first met him. He was super shy and ran away at the sight or sound of us. It took weeks before hubby got close enough to stroke him. Then pretty soon he couldn't get enough of our caresses.

I remember the first time he jumped on my lap; the one time he let my face come so close to his that we nose bumped; the last time he hung out with me as I sat in the front yard. He was such a source of joy and comfort.

By the fifth day, I got sufficiently concerned that I went out of our compound to search for him, knowing full well that the chances of finding him that way were slim. I even looked in drains along the road.

Hubby found him. A black mess among trash, ravaged by maggots. He must had passed the first day he went missing. Seeing the pendant I put on him just a month ago confirmed it's him.

Strangely I did not cry. About 5 years ago, I was quite emotional when I had to say goodbye to a community cat which I fed a couple times a week. Granted I had been feeding Tux for about a year while we only really knew Oscar for 3 months.

Perhaps it is age or maturity but it was a quiet acceptance as hubby and I stood where he decided would be his final resting place. Away from us but not that far off where we would never find him? 

Perhaps as the number of days he went missing increased, we had already started accepting that the chances of him reappearing alive were decreasing. There really was not much that we could do but hope for his return.

So it was with composure and resolute that we did what was necessary to move his body and bury him. I got the necessary equipment and hubby transported him to a secluded corner and started digging.

It was difficult to look at Oscar's body. He had such soft and smooth fur that was .. no more. He had been so graceful and light on his paws but it looked nothing more than dead weight. He had serenaded me with his gentle purring and it was so silent.

Perhaps the tears will come after all.

Confessions of a Mahjong Addict

The other night, I played mahjong. By myself. 

Yes, myself playing all 4 winds or "sides" of the table.
I did not even use a square table.
I did not even have a full set of tiles.
I did not even play with normal size tiles. 

I was that desperate to play. Actually no. I invited the hubby to join me (even though he barely knows the game) but he was too exhausted from work that day. But I wanted to play something. I had brought both my miniature mahjong tiles and my bead pyramid IQ puzzle to our trapezium-shaped study desk and thought I self-entertain a little before sleep. 

I didn't think I would enjoy a solo mahjong session, with tiny feather-light tiles, but as it has been months (4 to be exact!) since I last played mahjong, I chose that over the IQ puzzle.

The miniature set was bought off Carousell because I like mahjong and I like tiny things. It was also inexpensive being secondhand. At that point in time, my personal Hello Kitty set was with a friend and I just wanted a set to begin introducing the hubby to my favourite game so I purchased it even though it was missing the animals. 

With the missing animals and solo playing, I figured I would go easy on the rules and just go back to the basics of getting 4 sets and a pair of eyes for a win. So easy-peasy. Thought I would bore quickly...

how I missed these 4 walls

I played for more than 2 hours.
Even though I had to think for 4 "players".
Even though I had to set up all 4 walls after each round.
Even though I got confused at least 4 times "whose" turn it was.

Thing is, despite the simplistic rules, the mental effort required, and the lack of satisfaction from discarding a normal size mahjong tile of substantial weight with style, I still enjoy the game. 😍

unique solo mahjong setup

It is so gratifying to draw that one tile you had been banking on; the pleasure of seeing the sets you envisioned falling into place; that ultimate vindication of winning on that last available tile you needed. Amazingly, even the heartache of drawing another hong zhong 🀄 after finally letting one go on the previous turn does not lessen with the reduced size of the tiles!

this was a big win!

As I had to oversee 4 arrays of tiles, the longish table actually worked pretty well. The tiles for the dealer always comes first. So east, south, west, then north down the length of the table. It was also helpful that I was on a rolling desk chair!

long table is good for solo mahjong! And another big win!

Although I was not playing with money or chips, the "pro" in me still gravitated towards qing yi se, ban se, ping hu and peng peng hu. I was not even counting the tai, but after a few rounds I got curious about which side of the "table" is becoming the "big winner" and began to track "who" is winning.

so amused by how I named the 4 directions of the "table"

Initially I only used the first letter of the different directions but decided to give them names eventually. It appears Libby's fengshui was not so good. Odd that that was the side where my notebook with red cover stood. Hmm...

Anyway, yes, I confess I am a mahjong addict.

The following day, we had a power outage on the estate which lasted for quite some time. Guess what I thought of. I suggested playing mahjong to the hubby and he agreed! He really did not have many alternative things to do. 😂

We got a rectangular table and sat in the living room with lots of natural light. He was "Timmy" (well, he can't be a Tammy right?) and "Ronny" while I became "Libby" and "Betty". I could have played for 3 but it was not hubby's first time so with his intelligence, I was sure he could handle it.

Because I really wanted him to play with me for a long time, I put on my teacher's hat and really tried to make the learning process easier and smoother for him. Kept the rules simple and allowed no tai wins (personalised learning). When he couldn't remember the chinese characters for numbering, I provided a pictorial reference (scaffolding). After every round, I explicitly explained my tiles on hand and my strategy (modeling) and also discussed his tiles and strategy (feedback). Most importantly, I was very patient. At his playing speed, most of my mahjong kakis would want a new kaki!

the scaffold provided to hubby. actually much better versions available online

Maybe it had to do with the name Libby by the end of 1 round (each player being dealer at least once), Libby did not win a single time while Ronny was the ultimate winner. Yes, my hubby won more times than me.

this got to be the ultimate no tai win

I must find our square table so I can finally use my Hello Kitty mahjong tiles but first, I need 2 more players! Let's start a mahjong club in Uruguay??!! Playing mahjong comes with a slew of benefits!!!! Or do you prefer a scientific research conclusion?